Money doesn't actually talk. We do.

Credit Cards and Venereal Disease

If you ask these people, today’s twentysomethings are swarming with financial scabies.

KeepItInYourPants.org is handing out a $5,000 scholarship for the student who can produce the best Debt Disease PSA and perpetuate its gimmick of likening credit-card debt to STDs. You can see the Pants People’s intro video (Barry White alert!) here, via US News and World Report.

I admire the general mission of the campaign, but I think most of us would rather take a missed credit-card bill payment over the clap any day. And unlike STDs, credit cards can actually be good for you. Last I checked, there weren’t any rewards program out there for herpes infections.

It’s no secret that banks and credit-card companies seek out college kids like underage frat boys looking for a kegger. And the average undergrad will have $2,327 in credit card debt by graduation.

But what about the irony of handing out a $5,000 scholarship to promote debt awareness and not even breathing a word about ballooning student loan debt? I looked all over the Debt Disease site with its nifty iPod icons and awkward pop-punk design (because kids today LOVE that stuff) and couldn’t find ANY information about how to use credit cards responsibly, establishing credit history or the fundamentals of student loans.

So who are the sexually-charged folks behind this campaign? None other than the Service Employees International Union, a labor union that is over 1.9 million members strong and represents mostly health-care workers. I’m sure these are good, chlamydia-hating people, and I’m no expert, but gimmicky web sites don’t seem to be helping on the STD infection or debt fronts.

KeepItInYourPants does point out the evils of the Big Banking industry, but considering that having a credit history is essential in today’s economy, it seems silly to scold the large institutions without offering us meek consumers any direction. The subprime mess only seems to be getting worse and now more than ever young people need sound information – rather than sensationalized, politically-charged campaigns – about their financial lives. And hey, if you want to hand out free condoms that’s cool, too.

The key thing that unites sex and money is that people don’t like to talk facts about either of them, so the new challenge to trendy dot-orgs is not only to lure people in, but to offer intelligent insight. Is watching a bunch of student films about spending and syphilis really going to have an impact on what’s in my wallet? What the hell is an interest rate? A credit score? Compound interest? Stopping the spread of economic warts might start with learning the basics.

-Mary Pilon