Money doesn't actually talk. We do.

I’m Off

Okay, so here’s the thing: I’m leaving.

As in you won’t see my meaningless brilliant ramblings on here anymore. I know, it’s tragic. No more blog posts that deviously try to pass off topics like web-based shows, plastic surgery and sex toys as being relevant to personal finance. No more grumbling about financial aid, or bullying student lenders, or ridiculing inane financial products and bank advertisements. But don’t worry, someone will be right along to pick up where I left off.

Anyway, I thought I’d go out by sharing some of my genius accumulated financial wisdom with you. These aren’t exactly the kinds of things that will help you open a bank account or pay off loans, but I swear, they can be just as practical. I can’t divulge all my devices, but here are a few as a parting gift:

• If you’re ever so strapped for cash that you’re on a Ramen diet ($.20 a meal!) and are a little concerned about the nutrition value (all that sodium!), drop an egg into the broth. It will add some protein to an otherwise not-so-healthy dinner and give the noodles some real flavor—which means you can use just half of that salty flavor packet.
• Before buying anything (gadgets, tickets, services) see if you can get it for free or at least at a discount through your friends, alma mater, employer, or due to your age or location.
• When shopping for clothes, food, or anything really, look for something that is scratched, dented, missing a button, or close to an expiration date and demand a discount from the manager of the store. It’s typically at least 15% off.
• When dealing with any customer service rep on the phone, just ask to speak with their manager/supervisor right away. It will save you time and energy. Generally people that answer phones and man store counters never have the authority to do anything except end conversations with “I’m sorry, that’s just our policy.”
• If something goes wrong at a restaurant, store, or business you’re using, write a letter of complaint. I know, it’s what your grandma used to do, but really, it works! You can get comped meals, gift certificates and store credit.

Okay, that’s all I got. So many cliches to use here, so I’ll just go with a simple bye.

–Irina Aleksander

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